How To Cope With Aggressive And Violent Behavior In Your Child With Aspergers
We came across this article, found it really interesting and had to share it on our blog. Elissa & Steve
For many parents of children with Asperger’s Syndrome; coping with violent and aggressive behaviour can be a very difficult challenge indeed. In this article I will outline the 2 essential factors that you need to know to cope with such behaviors.
Aggressive behavior in the child with Asperger’s Syndrome occurs for a reason, just as it would with any other child. No child ever really just “acts out” for no apparent reason whatsoever. The key is in the words “apparent reason” – there is ALWAYS a reason but the major challenge for the parent is often working out what that reason is.
Inappropriate behavior, whether mild or severe, generally occurs in order to:
1. Avoid something – for example a child may become aggressive and shout before getting the school bus; as they want to avoid going to school.
2. Get something – for example a child may lash out at another child because they want to get the toy that the other child is playing with.
3. Because of pain – for example a child may show a range of challenging behaviors to their parents because they feel in physical pain, such as having earache.
4. Fulfill a sensory need – for example a child may lash out or shout in the classroom if it is too noisy, too busy, too bright, too hot, or strong in a particular smell.
So the first step in reducing or eliminating this behavior is to determine the need that it fulfills by looking at the four categories above. The second step is to teach them a replacement behavior, which they can use to communicate what they want or don’t want. It may even involve using some of their obsessive or self-stimulating behaviors (like hand-flapping, rocking, pacing) as a replacement behaviour. This is because it would be far less intrusive to others than aggressive behaviors, but still serve the same purpose. It could also be about encouraging the child to express their feelings or negotiate verbally. For other children they may communicate through another method like emotion cards, drawing, using symbols or “talking” through a puppet. You know your child best so you need to determine this.
This process takes time and initially, depending on the behavior, you may not have time. If the behavior is severe, then you need to remove the child from whatever situation they are in at the time immediately. Simply insisting that they stop the behavior and participate in whatever is occurring will not benefit the child or you; unless you remove them from the situation first. Maintaining your child’s routine will go a long way towards reducing the need for inappropriate or aggressive behavior in the first place. Because for children with Asperger’s routine is a great source of stability and comfort for them.
So just to recap the 2 critical factors for coping with your child’s aggressive and violent behaviors are:
1. Identify the real cause of the behaviour from the 4 main categories above.
2. Teach the child to communicate the real cause of the behaviour to you in a less harmful manner.
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Dave_A_Angel
September 21st, 2007 at 9:53 am
I wish it was that straight forward!!
September 21st, 2007 at 1:33 pm
Sounds good in theory doesn’t it! I think it’s one of those constant work in progress things.
September 22nd, 2007 at 8:36 am
Let us hope this attempt works.
I have tried on a number of occasions to post on your blog but it always seems to block my comments.
Here’s hoping!
I have found that Beauty’s meltdowns are usually associated with her inability to communicate.
She drops something and I don’t see it and she wants to get it back is one that happens a lot. The paddy that is thrown is monumental and all she is trying to do is tell me what she has lost!
And the only violence with Beauty appears to be over affection, she picked the puppies up next door with her hands around their necks! She just didn’t understand that she could hurt them.
I think I am very lucky with Beauty as she is so placid and happy all the time, she is a little treasure.
September 22nd, 2007 at 10:16 am
Hi Allyson,
Really glad to hear from you! I’m sorry your comments have been blocked, there must have been a technical hitch somewhere - at least you’re through now!
Jack’s meltdowns and aggression are mainly due to frustration, where he can’t find words to use or basically forgets to try and use words. We’re trying desperately to teach him replacement behaviours and like anything I guess, sometimes he seems to really improve, and other times we feel like we go miles backwards!
Other times we have the meltdowns and aggression when he’s out of routine or he’s around lots of people or people he’s not comfortable with and you can literally see his brain overloading - it’s like his eyes rolling back in his head, the signs are so clear - but usually by this stage we just have to ride out the storm, it’s too late then to even attempt reminders of the ‘new behaviours’.
Again, it’s a work in progress!
Cheers,
Elissa
November 19th, 2008 at 5:16 pm
I read this article, too, and it’s just more difficult that it sounds to remove the cause of the explosion. When my son wants something he cannot have or something that isn’t even available (like more bananas and they are all gone or like bringing a toy to daycare when it’s against the rules) I canot remove the cause. The cause is a rule that cannot be broken or a wish that cannot be fulfilled. That’s when it’s truly worse. He gets so violent and I have no idea how to make it stop. Anyone have advice?